This is how my brain works (yes I know it's weird)

After I posted Letter 7 something about it bothered me, but I couldn't put my finger on it. What was it? The poems, I realized, the poems were sticking out too much and ruining it. I decided to change it, so I striped the poems from the interior of the letter and just put them on the bottom.

It's a temporary solution. I have no idea what do with with them.

First, let me share with you my thoughts while I was revising Letter 7, they went as follows:

Letter #7

You know the problem with this one. It's scattered. Way too scattered and the present tense/ past tense is way way out of control.
Unlike some of the latter ones there is no narrative, no flow. It's a problem. There is a lot going on here, to introduce and dissemble. It needs work.

Events, etc
Ange and Rhea's plan to switch places
Eiolan introduced
Lackscroft and Roe also introduced
Ange gets wet, falls into river
Ange tells the story of the ring to L and R
Red wisps disappear, and Rhea is given the ring

There is Good news and Bad News.

First the bad, then the good. too many spirals. It feels like this

It could be more

or

or

Linear is so difficult though. I don't think Ange is linear, but neither is she scatter or crazy or

(Weird huh? Does it make sense, what I'm trying to say here? I tried to recreate the page as best I could. I scribbled spirals and coils and weird lines, as if I couldn't express in words what I wanted from the letter. It's also amusing that I never say what the good news is - I dwell far too much on the bad news. I can get pretty abstract when I talk to myself about revising.)

Anyway, I thought I'd share that bit of weirdness, but now let me be serious here. What I want from these letters. The poetry letters, which begin with #6, and end with #8) First off let me say I love them - I love the poetry in them. It's so fun, its random, and so badly written. The poetry adds to the characters and the world. I think I like your method best Terrwyn, (in letter 6) of having the poems right in the midst of the story, breaking up the action, a little interruption for comic purposes. I've decided it doesn't detract from the narrative flow, rather its fun to see Mirth explode. It adds another layer to the fun.

I just want Lackscroft and Roe's poems to be scribbled in the margins. Ange's seventh letter doesn't need them to interrupt too much, like I did before when I put the poems into images and forced them into the story here and there. I don't want that anymore, that's why I took them out. Using force is bad, no forcing.

Ultimately, you know it depends on the editor. When we find one to publish this story, we'll have to see what the editor wants, but we should have an idea to present to the editor. For the poems to be scribbled here and there on the margins, as a footnote or endnote or header. I like to think its unusual - but its not unheard of. For instance, Terrwyn I know you're familiar with Emily the Strange: the Lost Days by Jessica Gruner, (author) Rob Reger (author and illustrator) and Buzz Parker (illustrator).

This book mixes illustration and text. I mean, look at the authors/illustrators. (Pity I can't draw or maybe we could I would try to illustrate it ourselves)

Go here and click on the book cover to 'Look Inside'. The first few pages show how fun it can be when the text isn't just text, but has lists, and a script like a movie, and coffee stains and drawings, etc. That's the sort of thing I want to do with Goosey.

How about you Terrwyn?